Dear Rodger,
My BF and I have been dating for three years and living together for two. We both agree that we want to spend the rest of our lives together. We are in our late 20s and make good salaries. I have been putting money into an account every month to pay for our wedding. My BF does not contribute to the account because he keeps spending his extra money each month on his wardrobe. I feel like I am the only one working to have the wedding of our dreams. I also fear that what is going on is that he is commitment phobic but does not want to say that directly but is communicating it by not saving money for the wedding.
Resentful Saver
Dear Resentful Saver ~
I wonder if you & your BF may not share the same dream—at least when it comes to the kind of wedding you want. That is, perhaps your dream is to have a big wedding, while he would be perfectly happy just to go down to the courthouse & find a justice of the peace. If that’s the case, you have to decide if you also would be satisfied with that scaled-down type of wedding.
In short, my advice is that you stop feeling resentful & start talking to your BF about what you both want & what compromises you’re both willing to make.
Rodger
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
it is so ridiculous that so many girls place having a big wedding above about everything else
at least this is one dilemma 2 gay dudes do not have to restle with - whether to have a big elaborate wedding or not
Once again, I very much agree with your advice. The woman needs to stop feeling resentment and start talking to her boyfriend about what is next and whether or not it is marriage. He needs to move toward that goal, if that really is his goal, and start acting like the way he is talking.
In the last few years weddings have gotten totally out of control. They are too expensive and too lavish and too over the top. I do not blame any man who wants to opt out of the big wedding direction.
I want to comment on the comment from the Jim guy. He said gay couples do not have to worry about having big weddings because they do not have big weddings. From what I read gay couples have huge expensive weddings in California and the other states when they marry.
if this guy is spending all his extra money on clothes, the girl has bigger things to worry about than whether she has a big wedding
Post a Comment